Die Kassierer (The Cashiers), also Die m?chtigen Kassierer (The Mighty Cashiers), are a satirical punk band from Bochum-Wattenscheid in North Rhine-Westphalia, Germany. The group was founded in 1985 by Wolfgang Wendland (vocals), Nikolai Sonnenschei?e (guitar), Volker Kampfgarten (drums, jazz guitar) and Mitch Maestro (bass guitar).
The songs of Die Kassierer are often about drugs, sex, violence, and strange phenomena - such as aliens - and are extremely satirical.
Die Kassierer have been criticised for making what has been considered aggressive and socially as well as sexually disorienting music, but up to now only the album Habe Brille (Have glasses) has been officially indexed as harmful by the "Bundespr?fstelle f?r jugendgef?hrdende Medien" (Federal Department for Media Harmful to Young Persons). This indexing was due to the original album's pornografic cover-photo. Shortly after the indexing the cover was changed, so that the LP was acceptable for sale in Germany again. Further attempts to label other LPs of Die Kassierer have been blocked by the courts because their songs were deemed satirical and socially critical enough to qualify as "Kunst" (art).
Some of Die Kassierers' songs are about the region the band members come from.
In honor of the 20th anniversary of the band in 2005 nineteen artists, including the Donots, Die Lokalmatadore, Hennes Bender, Emscherkurve 77 and Mambo Kurt recorded songs of Die Kassierer for a tribute album, also called "Kunst". Bela B. and Rodrigo Gonz?lez from Die ?rzte played under the pseudonym 2 fickende Hunde (2 Fucking Dogs). 4 years before Die Kassierer had played a song for the Die ?rzte- tribute sampler "G?tterD?mmerung". They had transformed the song "Du willst mich k?ssen" (You want to kiss me) into "Du willst mich fisten" (You want to fist me).
"Gro?es Glied" (Large Penis)
"Ich t?te meinen Nachbarn und verpr?gel seine Leiche" (I Kill My Neighbour and Beat Up His Body)
"Sex mit dem Sozialarbeiter" (Sex with the Social Worker)
"Menschenkatapult" (Catapult for People)
"Tot, tot, tot" (Dead, Dead, Dead)
"Gott hat einen IQ von 5 Milliarden" (God has a 5 Billion IQ)
"Abschaum der Nacht" (Scum of the night)
"Wenn das Wasser der Ruhr... blondes Pils w?r" (If the Water in the Ruhr River Were Only Golden Pilsner...)
"Bin ich oder hab ich?" (Am I or have I?)
"Kommse mit ins Stadion?" (Gonna Come Along to the Stadium?)
"Im Jenseits gibts kein Bier" (In Nirvana There is No Beer)
"Thomas Wenner" (Thomas Wenner was the chief of the police of Bochum and had a bitter argue with Wolfgang Wendland)
"Sauerlandlied" (Sauerland Song)
"Mit meinem Motor" (With My Engine)
"Das Leben ist ein Handschuh" (Life is a glove)
"Ich onaniere in den kopflosen Rumpf von Uwe Seeler" (I masturbate into the headless trunk of Uwe Seeler)
1987: "Fit durch Suizid" (Fit through Suicide) /production stopped in 1994
1989: "Sanfte Strukturen" (Gentle Structures)
1993: "Der heilige Geist greift an" (The Holy Spirit Attacks)
1995: "Goldene Hits, teilweise in Englisch" (Golden Hits, partly in English)
1997: "Habe Brille" (I Got Glasses)
1998: "The Gentlemen of Shit" / completely in English
1998: "Taubenvergiften" (Poisoning Pigeons) / cover-CD of songs from Georg Kreisler
2000: "Musik f?r beide Ohren" (Music for Both Ears)
2000: "Jetzt und in Zukunft ?fter" (Now and Even More Often in the Future)
2003: "M?nner, Bomben, Sateliten" (Men, Bombs, Satellites)
2005: "Kunst - 19 K?nstler und sie selber spielen Lieder der Kassierer" (Art - 19 artists and Die Kassierer themselves play songs of Die Kassierer)
2006: "Das schlimmste ist, wenn das Bier alle ist" (The Worst Thing Is, when the Beer is Gone ) /split with Too Strong.
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